“Abnormally Normal” (Post #16) Lessons Learned by a Dating Widower
After reading about all of my ignorant mistakes as a 62 year old dating widower, some of you probably have concluded that: 1) I dated very little in my adolescence, and therefore I’m mistake-prone when dating in my senior years; or 2) I am an impulsive jerk who flies by the seat of his pants; or 3) I have more estrogen than testosterone; or 4) I’m really a woman writing about mistakes that my male suitors have made; or 5) I’ve got an ego the size of Montana, and that I’m really bragging about all these mistakes; or perhaps 6) I was raised in a dysfunctional family.
Please allow me to remove all doubt about the above postulates.
1) My first date was at the age of 16; went ‘Steady’ (yeah, that’s what they called it back in the day) with a girl at age 17. I dated a couple handfuls of girls in high school. I don’t remember how many girls I dated in college, but it was more than I can count on my two hands and two feet. So . . . “no” to #1 above.
2) Although I can be impulsive at times, when it comes to introspection, contemplation, and constipation, I’m just like the next guy. I don’t fly by the seat of my pants. I like planning ahead. I like weighing my options. I consistently scrutinize consequences for decisions I make.
3) Please read post #7 for the answer to this assertion. Sometimes I believe that I can ‘think like a woman’ because of working 32 years exclusively beside women (Aha! Maybe that’s my problem!) With this experience, one would think I’d have more success dating them. But, alas, that’s not the case.
4) Ah . . . no. Oh, and I’ve never had a ‘male suitor’! Never will!
5) If I wasn’t “talking to my computer” by typing this blog, my mistakes would NEVER see the light of day. If I had to verbally share them with my siblings, my children, my dates, OR my minister, I would immediately experience a bout of amnesia. Two simple words describe my emotions as I share these posts: I’m embarrassed.
6) Well . . . we did have to eat radish sandwiches from time to time cause there was no meat in the house; and sometimes ‘gravy bread’ was the entrée for dinner; and I was actually required to do chores (like taking out the garbage, washing dishes, cleaning the bathroom); and we only had one (1) black & white TV while I was growing up; and I was spanked when I needed it; and mom and dad really did love each other and me . . . so if any of that is dysfunctional, I’m guilty.
So, what I’m really trying to communicate with this post is that I believe, sincerely believe, that I’m a VERY normal 62 year old man. I am a normal healthy and active man of average intelligence. I’m so normal, I’m almost boring. So I learned that if all this crap can happen to a ‘normal dating male’, it shouldn’t be a surprise if some of it also happens to you.